Unwilling Experience
by Agent Midnight
Summary: POV (Haku), angsty-- set directly during episode 16, focuses on Haku's thoughts while in the ice mirrors (and how he feels during the slow motion). ^_^ First Naruto fic.


Light flashes wildly before my eyes as I sink back into my safe haven, the world before me twisting itself into a sick parody of the normal structural life that I've grown familiar with. The two figures inside my cage seem to pause for a split second before they flicker violently in front of my eyes, their movements slowing to a frame-by-frame visual that I had once witnessed in one of those old television programs at my old house.  
  
Their voices blur and make a weak attempt at correcting themselves to my enstranged environment, but no sensible words reach my cloudy mind. I inhale the sharp bitterness of the inward air, forcing it past the sheets of protection around me and into my burning lungs, a brief moment of pleasure dancing across my senses.  
  
I allow my mind to separate and tear itself into pieces of awareness, a feeling of pure euphoria settling over my body as my eyesight splits into numerous parts, my brain following the motions with a programmed accuracy. I gaze at the two of them from behind their backs, above their heads, next to each of them in turn; watching as they watch each of my reflections in the mirrors of ice.  
  
The silent one turns to his companion, speaking in a rush of words that appear slower than they are actually happening. He moves off to one side, his body pausing every now and then directly in the air as he runs, feet dashing off the ground. Sometimes I wonder how people would react if they could experience what I'm experiencing right now in my cavern of blurry light and discarded sound.  
  
In the distance, I feel more souls gathered outside of my world, their warmth burning against me with excruciating persistence. Paranoia begins to creep into my dulled thoughts, a voice calmly telling me that no one would dare try to attack by my weakness. Your companion's got you covered, it says. Promise. Sure enough, one of them is familiar in my mental systems, allowing me to grasp onto an ounce of comforting heat amongst my new-found enemies. That brief wash of heat manages to force my mind back onto its regular track, pushing away the momentary fear I feel for my own companion. Through all these years, my worry for him has not stopped growing, but he can certainly take care of himself better than I ever could.  
  
I have met one of these boys before in the warmth of trees and shade of the forest. Looking back, I have to wonder if I had made a mistake by pushing aside my guard and talking to him. He drew me to him instantly with the first words he spoke, sending shivers down my spine and a smile to my lips. For a brief moment, he had made me feel like I was normal. I wanted to laugh and continue speaking nonsense words to him until I had to go back to my only friend.  
  
Maybe I hoped for another friend. Maybe I knew he was like me.  
  
Maybe some part of my mind knew we were going to have this encounter; just the three of us, separated from life to exist in horrifying unity until someone has to back down and go back to the world we reside on.  
  
Two people wanting to get out; one trying to keep the two forever.  
  
In the awful slow motion of soundless noise, they throw their gazes to look at each other, something snapping in both their eyes that wasn't there before we had started this ridiculous dance of life and death. They take staggering steps towards each other as the blood that I have caused to flow runs across their punctured wounds to make a sick journey across busted lips or torn flesh. The silent one reaches a hand out to steady my one-time acquaintance as he began to slowly tip towards the hard ground, his own arms bringing themselves up to rest on his teammate's shoulders for balance.  
  
Their lips move slowly, hardly shifting to reveal the act of soft whispering as I watch, unable to understand them but knowing what they plan to do. The silent one looks directly at me, his angry eyes breaking through the ice barrier to clash with mine. The blonde whips his head around to gaze at another mirror, meeting eyes but not the ones I feel right now. They continue to hold each other up, supporting each other like they had been friends for years rather than the hesitant team they're proving to be at the moment.  
  
Their plan falls into motion as the blonde pushes away from his companion, bringing his hand to rest lightly by his chest. Images rip across my line of vision as his body begins to mold and blend into copies of himself. The silent one's eyes are flashing everywhere as I exit my mirrors and send my weapons raining down on them. The copies dissapear one by one in clouds of graying smoke until all that's left is the two of them, resting on the ground as blood starts to seep from their fresh wounds.  
  
The silent one's up first, and he starts talking to my acquaintance, finally turning fiery eyes to the curled up figure of his teammate. Finally, both of them stand once again on their feet, pushing aside the pain I know they must be feeling and getting ready for another attack. They share more words, the blonde nodding slowly to show agreement and they get into an aware stance yet again, both of them finding my location instantly.  
  
The copies appear again, and the three of us move through the familiar action until they lay panting on the ground. They don't stand a chance against me if they continue this way, but the silent one must know a plan. He must see my flaw because I noticed his eyes trying to follow my exact path as I moved from mirror to mirror, reflection to reflection.  
  
When their battered faces turn so I can fully see them, and their determined eyes glance from mirror to mirror to mirror... I feel my defenses start to crumble slowly under the pressure of the whole situation. I try to block the sensible part of my mind out, but I find myself failing.  
  
Oh, god. Help me.  
  
This time when they do the same technique, all it takes is a split second and I find myself making a tiny mistake to hopefully alert the silent one. It works like a charm and his observant eyes instantly catch the change of routine, said boy seeming to light up for a flash of a moment as hope made an appearance.  
  
In motion, the plan seems like it might work.  
  
In motion, I thought the plan might work.  
  
In motion, my instincts take over and I instantly begin to defend my territory.  
  
When my mind clears enough for me to focus again, I see my acquaintance holding the now-extremely still form of his partner, his wide gaze locked firmly on the relaxed face. Suddenly, his burning eyes are shooting up to glare at every single mirror, searching for me.  
  
And all I can do is watch with growing fear as the person I had met became someone I don't know.  
  
Everything goes blank as he races towards me with true fury dancing in his eyes.  
  
Do I really want to survive though this?  
  
Do I really want to go back to the world I have to live in?  
  
... even after I've broken my promise to my only friend? 


End file.
